the pogeon
by Sorkari
Summary: Eren tells Levi his pet chicken isnt a real pet and is generally an unpleasant asshole but then he raises a pigeon and comes to love it and then karma gets him. Crackfic i guess bc im fuckn BAKED *prequel 2 the golfbidh"


A **?N: Bro t** hi si a story about eren raising a pgieon wirthout LEvi but then later inckudes him

fpr captainof the rirene ship because I love themand it's their birthday so im givinf them a birthday gift

* * *

 **yalol can skip this partr**

Under the shining sun, where vegetables grew, in pots and otherwise, ocoooking roast for cinco de mayo, Erenw as spooning begetables into the crock pot. Hes really cute but not resaly. Not TOO cute. just ute. He was expecting LEvi over kfor an event that i havent made up yet. I guess they're in a relastionshup ? ?something like that

It was their dirst date. ERen was poor and couldnt decorate accordingly. He was palying Skyrim Sword int he cLouds whwne LEvi knocked.

i ot to make a storu what the uck

One day after Eren cooked a cro k pot, he invited LEvir oover for a Let's {Play. It was a rally sunn ii day but when its light out an teh clouds are in the sky and theyre fluffy. Sidd I mention that Eren was sad yet because he's a thundercunt. HE cojdltn deal with this.

I guess LEvi's showing up in a carriage witha pesusi , you know flying horses, in hi s empo punk stage. he hates his parents. he hated KENNY. k EN NY . HE hates his parents and his parents' are dead. He hates hi s uncle but not relaly his uncle because his umcle does his best to afford him. Fuck. fq.

Eren has to ivnvite him inside because its sunnty and the rain is int eh day, spill the code, ,spill LUMA

ERen tjhisk, "i ot gona GOOF tonight like the las titme so i can make trhis the final date." why is it the fial date ? the world may nevr knoew haha

DOnt ask why tjeres a other luna. I have the real luna. HShe's in the sky. THe mon. THat's rough buddy,

Int he end klevi Visits and he says Hello

Whast happens next ?

bet

mysterios cliff jhang er

* * *

Okay thi sis my seocnd attept you guys

 **tAKE #**

 **E** ren was making soup. HE was making a stew. He ivited Levi over, and the skies were blue. They ate food and they sat at the table and eren said, ""my dog DIed"

Levi was shook. s"the dog diED?" and he klaughed about it. god knows wht.

"wht are you laughing, ?" ERen asked . hew as angry. "i betmy LIFE you never had a DOG"

"I have a ,pet chicken," LEvi ssaid, "she kclcusk and she died. "

"well thats not a real pet "

Levi was lowkey depressed about that. THis was not an easy part.

later on Eren lived his life peacefull until later when he found abird. A small brid. It was a pigeon. the PIGEON was a pigeon, the most pigeon fo all pigeons, pigeon of the light, the living pigeon. She's beautiful. Eren noticed that birds are fuckin uglywhen theyre fresh out the oven dude SHIT

ERen called LEvi up on his 64, and asked, "There s paigoern in my backyard what do i do"

"wel; get hi, out the damn gtuter first you animal hes a bbaBY" LEiv is angry

Eren goes ans dsaved the pigeon from the h2o

"okay so now you have to take care of it"

"Take care of apigeottto " ere asked "tf kidna tomfoolery are you tryna sell me bub'

"THe best kind,"  
'So ERen raise dht epigeon. THe gave the pigeon a heat up brownie one day and the pigeon lost her shit when sheate it and it was hot as fuck

"wait until it cools off you neanderthal," Erne told the pigeon.

"yeah but i already took the bte" pigeon says

erne assumed he must be fucking crazy so he ignored ht eoigeon. HE named rh epigeon later. Everytone thought he would name the littel bitch Carla after his mother, but he went with anotehr soccer mom name : Susan

Whle susan ate a fuckotn of seeds likeevery otherbird like how many seeds can those things fit holy shit.

THey grew really close, Eren and Susan were best friends, THey killed buttons together. They w ere button slayers. THey lived a good life

THen one day susan Died. ERen was so distraught and like apeeved author went and buzzed at LEvi

"SUsan died"

"susan isnt a real bird, "levi mocked because he's such a pettybitch and he kNOWS IT what a WET SOCK ';actualy susan isa bird i just remembered that so she iSNT A REAL PET"

eren rmemebred that asshole thing he said a long time ago. wen susan was alive i think. and hes so upset hes just. LOSING IT. What an asshole. HE CRIES dor a long time lie i do during exam seaosn. he should have never said that shit to levi. WHat the fuck eEren. THen he;d have a shouder to cry on.

The End,,,,

insert yoshi song(**

the END


End file.
